obviously, what else would I write about?

Everyone talks about their last love and how they will never love anyone as much again. And it’s true. You won’t. It’s not possible to love someone as much as you loved someone else. You love everyone differently, in a unique way. We need to stop comparing the people we like and love to one another. Older and ‘wiser’ people will often rag on teenagers who confess their undying love to every person they date. But the older crowd has got it wrong. Why not love everyone? That sounds cheesy, I know. But what I mean is why limit your feelings? Why not love your girlfriend or boyfriend? Does it matter if it’s only been a month, a couple of weeks? I don’t know. Maybe it does. I’m so indecisive. Maybe we need a way to express ourselves that means more than ‘I like you’ but not as significant as ‘I love you’… It’s a hard line to cross. Because if you say to someone I love you and then you break up how do you explain the ‘love’ deal? I think it’s safe to say I am completely lost when it comes to expressing my feelings. I don’t know how to do it. When I’m ‘with’ someone I want to shout from rooftops about my affections, but when it comes to actually telling the person? I can’t do it. Maybe it’s a fear of rejection, but even when someone is telling me they love me I have a hard time saying it. It sounds weird coming out of my mouth. Maybe I just need to learn how to love people?
Maybe that’s my problem; I don’t know how to love? Which is true, I don’t. I go from feeling rather indifferent to kind of obsessed. People meet this kind of distant detached girl and they think she’s kind of cool. But then she morphs into a neurotic freak with some sort of OCD about why you’re not calling me. I have issues. I will have to work on that.